D3aD

i'm dead! Really dead~
tons of assginments to be submit on this coming NOvember! >.<
computing essential - not started anything cuz no idea wats all the html all about
film and art - gosh! wat do u aspect from me?? i just enjoy movie NOT analysis-ing!
writing for academic purposes - damn, write essay den write essay la, why need to find 10 sources about it!
malaysian studies - the only assignment done cuz need to submit at the 1st week of Nov!
Quantitive Methods and CE - midterm soon (wtf, before dat test 1, test 2..end up now need midterm again..eeewww!)
stressss~

just keeping this alive

sleepy head~ (dis pic was taken last 2 weeks)

it's been awaile i hadn update myself!
hmm,
everything is still fine,
currently rushing for assignments and revising for midterm And AND try to sleep as much as possibe! as usual piggy Lynn loves to sleep with her lil doggie! xp
gotta move on~
ciaoz~

just emo-ing, ignore this passage

God damn it!
i cant sleep! wtf
was damn freaking tired and yet i am still rolling on my bed till dawn!
then finally fall asleep, but this is just a short nap, cuz i woke up again..
so the whole nite was sleep..awake..sleep..awake! sigh~
it's damn cold in the nite,
my skins are like the ice skating ring,
just lack of skaters wearing sharp knife shoes skates on it
brain keep popping up lotsa things..
i am damn freaking useless
i wanted to 挽回
but i was at the main fault, have got no 资格 to even speaks about it..
i am the idiot who cant really give love anymore
due to the limitations i have! LOSER!
all i can do is just stupidly crying..LAME
Lynn i hate u! damn it!
would u just get the fucking rid off urself?!
answer is No!
cause i was damn clear, even clearer than before,
i do Love u Bitch!
i promise that i'll respect ur decision made
as long u're happy, healthy and xing fu ALWAYS..
dats all i asked for
no matter how hard, how pain it is,
i can get over it..
there's just no other words to replace this~ i love u!





dun leave me, i am afraid..
Life is just so miserable..
ps, ily

Rest in Peace

when things comes to an end?

is there really peace?

does peace really exist?

nobody knows..and will never know

nothing special

As usual, i force myself out of bed early in the morning to college for CE's test
erm, it's actually not hard just tat i didn prepare for it..who cares, it's just a test! xp
Went to Bully's house after exam, i'm still the driver..haha
this time, choy yee, jin yi, and yvonne followed
at bully hse 3 of them were down stairs online-ing
while me and Bully two pig wanted to sleep so we went upstairs
ended up having some girls talk..haha
went back to school around 1.30++ for a meeting at 2pm!
classes ends at 5pm den straight go home..
... .. ... .. .. ....
.. ... .. ... .... ..












i will be ok
and i am still fine

things just happen out of sudden

Attended Malaysian Studies and Quantitative Methods this morning
classes ends at 11am
den out of sudden feel like going to mv for lunch!
den bUlly, Yvonne and me just straight drive there after class
i'm the driver of the day! haha
cuz Bully says she's tired!
moreover i have not been driving more a month,
so it's actually fun and exciting for all of us
reach mv dat time, dunno how cum while want to find duno watever 'zon' for parking,
suddenly the bloody road led us to another high way
we got lost! haha
went into duno which indian street full of indian shop
but at last, we still get back on our way to mv
Ate a bowl of laksa and then walk around lo..
den.. .. ..
dun wana mention,
about 1.30pm++, drive back to school
wasnt in the mood plus i'm tired
so nothing much happen

在外人面前强忍着眼泪
但还是忍不了鼻涕的直流 >.<
大概是自己不够坚强吧
所以到最后还是被别人用奇怪的眼神望着












面对着你，那不变的爱意还有笑容永远不会消失

The Second SEM full of "MAILs"

Subjects taking

• Malaysian Studies (Mrs Rabiha)
• Quantitative Methods (Mr Tommy)
• Computing Essentials (Mr Alan)
• Writting for Academic Purposes (Mr i forgotten)
• Films & Arts Appreciation (Mr Jefri)

hereby i apologize for the spelling error! xp

4 male lecturer and 1 female

OMfG!!! tOtALLy Speechless..

i Just Love this so much

we love each other ^-^

can u see love in us? lolx..

Deadly Chocolates

Duno wat had happen to me lately
i cant control myself for not consuming deadly chocolates!
i just couldn't resist the temptation of milky chocolateSS!! S.O.S
i've just finish the box of ferrero rocher..
and now i'm having giant bar of Toblerone
OMG!
sumbody pls STOP me!

Hey peoples,
my handphone number u guys having will not be using anymore!
will contact u guys personally for latest updates!
Sorry for all the inconvenience cause!

i'm bored

No class for today,

but i still wake up early and go college!

not b'cuz i love college,

is juz b'cuz i dun wan to stay at home

Sianzzz~

duno since when i started to feel like dat

i used to not even stay any longer in college when there's no class

but now..even got no class for the whole day,

i still go college!

haiz~

simple boring routine life i'm facing!

really tired

Lynn wants to get OUT!

out of this kind of Life!!!

but....sigh~

Shut UP!

There you go, you're always so right
it's all a big show, it's all about you

You think you know, what everyone needs
you always take time to criticize me

It seems like everyday i make mistake
i just cant get it right
it's like i'm the one you love to hate
but not today

So shut up shut up shut up
don't wanna hear it
Get out get out get out
get out of my way
Step up step up step up
you'll never stop me
nothing you say today is gonna bring me down

There you go, you never ask why
it's all a big lie, whatever you do

You think you're special
but i know and i know and i know
and we know that you're not

You're always there to point out my mistake
and shove them in my face
it's like i'm the one you love to hate
but not today

So shut up shut up shut up
don't wanna hear it
Get out get out get out
get out of my way
Step up step up step up
you'll never stop me
nothing you say today is gonna bring me down

Don't tell me who i should be
And don't try to tell me what's right for me
Don't tell me what i should do
i don't want to waste my time
i'll watch you fade away

The Unbelievable

2nd semester started ad went to sku ytd to attend classes
and then during our break between classes
duno how cum sudden talk bout cinema and then we decided to go watch movie
at 1st we say watch laughing gor..
but then the show timing is not rite..
den wanted to watch The Orphan but the time is too long
cuz by time when we rush back to college, our class sure start ad
so at last The Unbelievable was wat we chose
that movie totally not our type man,
i shud say it is a documentary..a record from weird ppls..
it's about black magic..spooky spooky things..
Guess wat, chairs at my right hand side all empty,
inside there very few ppl..super cold..and i am wearing a short pants..
dat kinda 'qi fen' really....argh!!!
That fellar who shoot that movie totally suxx!!
duno wat happen to his skill,
after finish that show, my head is spinning!!
feel vommiting!
uhh, 1st time at cinema got this type of feel
in conclusion,
a totally eeewww for this "movie"!!

random pics of the day~

Didn really do anything today..

juz feel long time din take pics...

so it's SS time! haha. xp

Take 1

Take 2.. did my look change??

Take 3 ..learning to be a Piggy

Take 4..fail to be a pig. haha

Take 5

Take 6..i miss ur kiss babe!

Take 7..trimmed eye brows

Take 8..looks fake >.<

Take 9..double Lynn

Take 10! xp

That's all..hehz!

Specially dedicated to my Buddy!

Happy 18th Birthday Hui Ying!!

PS, cant go celebrate with u..hehez..next time bou fan shou k? xp

That's wat i call Real

juz random thought..
who is the one who will scold u when u're having ur 2nd stick of ice-cream and preparing to get the 3rd wan?
who is the one who will get u some drinks to cool u down when ur body temperature is heating up?
who is the one who will cry with u when u're in pain?
who is the one who will hold u through when u're in difficulties?
who is the one who will hug u tight when u're down?
who is the one who will get u some strepsils when u have a sore throat?
who is the one who will never give up on u when u do any wrong things?
who is the one who will hug u in the night when u're afraid?
who is the one who will listen to wat u say when u feel like talking?
who is the one who will laugh and cry with u?
who is the one who will share their thought and feelings with u?
who is the one who will tell u their difficulties too?
who is the one who will juz shout at u without hesitating?
who is the one who will comfort u when u need it?
who is the one who will ... ... ...
that's what i call Real!
i love u!!

Theory Exam

having theory exam on the 24th of August
keep having lessons like mad fellar..
uh..tire and stress and pressure
juz get over stressful finals exam though i din do very well
i still cant have my break!
haiz..
ppl says life is full of choices
but it doesn't really happens in me..
i cant say No for things that i dun wan to...>.<
ok, to adults, i'm always a small kid who cant think properly and cant differentiate wats right and wrong, wats good and bad...but hello! i'm already 18 yrs old!!!
haiz..so still have to wait for awaile..
so, i'm just letting it be..it's cuz i really cant do anything at all!
putting effort in trying to keep things all to myself~

trying hard

my life is so miserable
juz hope bad time flies swiftly away!
and more sweet times + happy moments to come!
currently enduring Things!
ish..
it's difficult but i have to go through
it's just the matter of time!
so i hope i faster reach 20+++ yrs old. xp
我很想。。我很想快点长大!!
but not old la..
To my dear buddies who are also facing difficulties,
chill up k?
after all these bad days,
let us welcome happy and delighting moments!
after all these, let's go happy hour!!
God Bless in everything!

Haze everywhere

today whole day at home
didn go out for breakfast cuz it's damn hazzy out there
duno do wat oso
damn tired..lazy..feel-less..
Sigh~
why dun the government set those ns camp for 2 yrs?
like sgpore..
those ppl are to serve the country for 2 yrs
if i'm in camp for 2 yrs
wow!
it would be fun man!
damn bored with my life now
cuz if there's no need to step in the hectic college
then i'll be idle-ing around the house like crazy ppl
bored! ish!!
help me out!!!!

duno wat happen

used to sleep late and wake up early~

but duno y dis morning couldn wake up

i feel very very heavy and tired

yesterday sleep quite early oso

haiz....

and duno why nowadays keep feel like eating

omg,

i really have to control myself these days

though the temptation is so strong!

haiz~

1st time

Woke up around 6 to prepare for my 7am piano class...
lolx..i know it's unusual-super early
but wat to do...
i rather finish it as early as posible at least if anything that held on Saturday,
it wont be a problem for me to attend!
i woke up at 6am, of course to condition my hair! haha
it's a big sacrifice for a pig like me! xp
well,
2 weeks didn practice piano..haha
cuz my piano teacher went to travel
and i'm taking advantage to be lazy!
lucky didn get any scolding this morning~
Drove alone to class as usual
and drove home at 8 something.
mum ask me to pour go and pour petrol when i reach home!
i was like..Shit!
i never did it before..
i've never ever drive ALONE to a petrol station and refill the tank!
at first i said NO,
and then mum says,
then there's no point for them to get me a car in future..cuz i dare not..T.T
so, at last..
i still go and try
luckily everthing went smooth~(wiping sweats)
a safe 1st time!
hahax!!

it's a Thursday

Finally i have a Thursday off
didn need to go to college~ wheeeee...
happy and sad..(obviously i'm emo-ing..xp)
happy cuz i've got a free day due to The End of sum classes for sem 1
and sad cuz there's another presentation for tomorrow.
sigh~
exhausted~
finals is coming soon
and yet i'm not flipping my books..xp
dun feel like studying..
damn dizzy when i see those tiny tiny words
and after reading and reading it still didn get into my brain
i give up!
just try luck during exams..haha
and my mum is going to kill me if i fail any of the subject
it'll gonna cost her at least a thousand per subject if i retake..xp

Hell Heels..@.@

it's a compulsory to wear formal for presentation
sienz~
i prefer wearing Tees + Short + Flip Flops..
comfortable..xp
a 3 inches of high heels really kills me on That Tuesday (1st presentation @2009)
sedaya international is having some kinda construction going on or i should say renovation
here close down there close down..zzz
have to walk and walk and walk to reach block C-where our lesson helds
even wana go to library also got problems
i'm like climbing and climbing cuz that road is a slope
with high heel-juz a normal 3 inches one
well,
i'm fine with heels when i do my shopping..xp
maybe cuz i'm concentrating on looking around and i didn notice if the heels does hurt my feet
but when i'm in sku on the stupid road...
super hard for me to reach my destination!
it deeply hurts my feet!!
*ish*
and loads of stairs to ups and downs...zzz
sigh~
thank god i didn fell!
if not.... .... ...(dare not think)

happenings~

wat on earth is this happenings to me!
tuesday~ bloody moral presentation - war
tuesday~ film and art presentation - recordings (embarrassing)
wednesday ~ office application - laptop
help!!!!
i dun wan to live anymore
i give up
i dun wan study anymore
i dun wan all these anymore
i am goin crazy
i juz wan to be me
T.T
i wan to go back to the pass
i wan to go back to secondary
i wan to go back to ns
i only wan my happy moments!!!
feeling so dead!
sigh~

i'm soooo sick!!!

it's almost the end of the 1st sem

damn sickening

it means my final is no far away

but dat doesn affect me

exams doesn bother me!

i'm juz sick of studying

i need a break!!!

argh~~

have to start coarse selection again

a big headache

here clash..there clash

why cant the college management set all properly?!!!

~juz so sick~

undergoing

when one was born into this world,

they're arent alone,

they have ppls with them which are called family

but when one grows up

they learned to be alone

and when time comes

they intend to get into a relationship

lucky ppls may bump into once and for all

and then, they'll have their love ones to be with them

to share, to care, to love, and to face...

they arent alone anymore

unlucky ppls may bump into unaccepted ones

was once to be loved, was once to be shared,

was once to be cared, was once not alone

and sadly,

to be alone again

when things are to come to an end

tears falling

heart breaking

life-less

speech-less

meaning-less

nothings seems to be wonderful

... ... ...



i dun wana giv up anything in my life

especially those i treasure the most

especially those i wanted the most

especially those i cared the most

especially those i loved the most

but..

sometimes,

things doesn just come as wat we want

but i'll not giv up

never will giv up

juz for wat i wanted the most!!

sienZz

arghhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm sick of my life

mentally sick

going crazzzzeeeeeeeee

i need a breakkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk....

i want to be juz me and my trusted ones!! T.T

bad dream

昨晚，我发了一个恶梦
好恐怖的梦。。。
梦里好黑暗，
我被吸血鬼。。应该说成是僵尸。。
被僵尸追来填满‘他’的肚子
当然，一个鬼和一个人，
鬼一定得到‘他’所想要的
‘他’吸了我的血后，
我，居然没有死到！
奇迹。。
这只僵尸居然会说话。。
我听见‘他’说，
怎么还有‘生’的味道。。
我当时不敢呼吸，动也不动地装死。。
装死也不容易，停止呼吸好痛苦。。xp
过后不知怎样就晕去了。。。。

duno y will have this type of dream~

random~

duno duno duno...
i think this is the term i use to used since i was childhood
i really duno..
i have no idea...
huh??..
wat is dat??...
parents providing everything...
to some ppl,
to older ppl,
to ppl without everything,
they do think is good..
but it's because they provide, means they care..
in other way of saying means they still can control u!
i dun hav the basic thing i wanted the most
Freedom~
maybe not all are like me, but i am one of the thousands out there,
i know it's good to be protected, to be care, to be love
but that doesn helps anymore at wat i am now,
i'm not growing,
i'm not independent,
i dun understand the basic living and society needs
how am i going to survive if i'm still carrying on this type of situation in future?
i'm actually one of the 生在福中不知福吧！
家家有本难念的经..你看我好，我看你好
有时候现在活得没有问题不代表是好事来的
而且就算有问题也不会说出来吧
现在还有父母
以后呢？
将来呢？
完完全全是黑漆漆的
在私生活里，很多时候，我都是独自一个人面对困境
一天到晚嘻嘻哈哈的我，总让人觉得好无烦恼，其实那不是我
我只是一个很会逞强，甚至很会掩饰自己的烦恼的人而已
或许我都不想让周围的人陪我一起烦吧！多一个人烦不如少一个
在我朋友的眼中，我都是个快乐又活泼的人
内心深处的我，是这样的吗？
我是个快乐的人吗？？

giving it a try

i'm starting to accept everything that has change
i've no other choices just to accept everything
i've to be positive in everything
hoping everything turns out not bad
hoping everything will be alright..
sumtimes god doesn't juz give us wat we want
we'll hav to work for it
work for everything
and i am,
putting my effort in everything
but of cuz i need ur support
u're my energy
u're my soul
u're my everything~

2009

half a year has gone..
everythings seems so different as last time already!
but i cant always stay in the back and not moving forward wert!
the most happiest moment of the year was being with u!!(the one who is important to me)
i juz hope more and more happy moments to come!
i am waiting...waiting.. and hoping!!!!

moutain kinbalu

Notice that rock behind the clouds??? That's the one i went up to!!!

The 1st impression i saw that mountain was OH MY GOD!

I didn aspect it was so high!! is like climbing to the heaven.
It really hurt my muscle went i got down from the mountain due to not been excercising at all. Luckily i'm not the one only, all who went up with me also suffer from terrible muscle pain!

Mine was not serious as them till have to take pills. lol

Everyone was walking like a crab after they've sucessfully got down from that life consuming mountain.

Guess wert, those crazy aunty still wana go shopping!

Having problem with walking still wana shop..sigh!

Pity those children like me force to walk too!

Missing the PAST

Life is so miserable, when u're having IT,
u wont even bother to look at IT, not to say appreciate it,
but once u losses it, and thats forever, GONE forever!!
Is this so called as LIFE??
I'm really sick of it!
Was once i have everything,
nice compound to study,
place to sit and fight for marks,
greens to exercise and have fun,
time to gossip or joke around,
chance to be in the best camp,
force to sweat yet helps in staying healthy,
fellow to speaks without hesitating,
bunch of happy true friends,
group of posers,
gang of our own,
few of the trusted once...
And now, i have nothing much left.
Age have bring me out of the compound i used to be,
Friends have left to strive for their future,
Time have stuck for assignments,
Mentally are welcoming pressure!!!
I hope there really have such thing so called as time machine to be on earth!
I really misses my PAST!
All my happy moments...
Sigh~

Life in College

i dun really like life at college.
ppl use to tell me it is not as fun as wat we thought during secondary school.
yet, i thought they were humble.
It's because movies shown by the hollywoods are so fun!
And now, i feel it.
Not fun at all. Nothing nice.


Sigh, but i still have to move forward,
there's no way to get rid of these and be able to jump into the future.
So, just hope time flies fast in the rainy days of mine.

continue...(nasional service)

well, kinda lazy to write it all out, ps
those who are able to get into my page are likely to have my contact..
so anything just call and ask me lorr....

National Service

Many complaints i've heard regarding about our country national service. Bad ones. Just very very few say it's Good. For the pass 3 months, i was sent to Pahang, Cherating for this program.
At first i was really not use to it, wake up before the sun rise to do exercise, bath with icy cool water everytime, eating spicy food as daily meals, sleeping in a full of dust dorm, speaking malay from time to time, having 'gotong-royong' every week.... Luckily i am not those home sick type, i juz use about 3-5 days to get use to it. I love those tuff activities there, maybe because i am those who are so in love with adventurous activity. I enjoy making friends but mostly chinese. Some teachers at there are so friendly. Some are such a racist till we actually feel it without been told.
We have been asked to go into the forest. Dirty utensils they gave us. Thousands of ppl have been using it. EEEWWW!! Basically Maggi mee is my meals!! And i actually planned how much water to use to drink. Sickening! Usually i dun have to hesitate to drink but at there have to think this think that. First time in life holding 'parang' knife chopping trees. Tiring and INSECTS!!! Argh~~ Big mosquito kissing my whole body, Giant ants visiting our tents...etc
Once finish this little part of thingy we called as wirajaya, we went straight back to campsite. Luckily i went to bath early, cause after that no water!! Stinky ppls in room. Nearly suffocate to death. Stinking for hours finally get back to wash up and yet no water. What in a world am i living. Lolx.
To be continue...